Took him bloody well long enough.
02.08.18
E19:34
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Music o' the Entry: "The Man with the Machine Gun", Final Fantasy VIII Fithos Lusec Wecos Vinosec Album
Bloody long title for just a simple explanation of my music of the day, eh? Ah well, the CD's all good and fun, from the little I've listened to it. Bless Matt's game music-loving soul, bless him indeed. Though I'm not sure WHO to ask to bless him...let's settle with Marduk, shall we? So yeah, anyway, still reveling in game music bliss, including that of Final Fantasy X, which I think I shall bequeath back to the original bequeather and steal something else, such as the OST's of Final Fantasies VI, VII, VIII, and IX. Because no, despite me being a game music whore, the only import Final Fantasy album I own is Pray, the rest consisting of Chrono OST's and Suikoden ones, though tragically the Suikoden music collection is reproducing much faster than my income allows me to purchase, which is approximately nothing at this point, thanks to the loveliness of college. However, because it is a limited edition and all that rot, I am the proud pre-orderer of Project Majestic Mix's latest offering, Squaredance, which, one may correctly conclude by observing the name, is a two-disc set of Square music arranged in assorted dance styles. If you're curious, there are still some limited edition two-disc sets available (the price is $45 US with shipping), and the place to be is here. So there, that's my random bit of advertisement for the day. I've enjoyed the samples I've listened to thus far, particularly "Hip-Hop Corridors" from ChronoTrigger just because I'm obsessed with the works of Mr. Yasunori Mitsuda. But yeah, anyway.
Well, it finally took long enough: Zombie Jidou Kaisatsu Souchi Weed, my undead betta that I acquired sometime last autumn, revolted against his zombie status and died. And I don't mean just "died", he died GOOD. Sure, he'd been doing the characteristic floating on side limply to where his body is vaguely U-shaped, typical behavior of dead fishes, but that wouldn't convince me. Because oh no, I know of his deceitful ways, that just because he looks dead by all appearances doesn't mean he is, which was confirmed by me touching him and he freaking out something good. But anyway, upon my awakening yesterday morning, I noted that Mr. Zombie Jidou Kaisatsu Souchi Weed was standing on his head on the bottom of the tank and was a sick reddish hue, as opposed to his usual brilliant blue. And he stayed that way, until I asked Matt to take him out of the tank and for once, I did put him in the freezer like I do with most of the corpses of my pets. Don't ask, it's a strange habit of my mother and myself that strikes others and ourselves at times as vaguely disturbing. I mean, how many other families when cleaning out their freezers and whatnot to move have to tell their daughters to go put the corpses of their hamsters in the compost? Oh well, at least there's nothing big in there right now and no pets belonging to people other than myself. So yes, all that remains in the 5-gallon tank in my room is the little unnamed albino cory catfish who I just decided to dub Captain Duck. Or maybe Cap'n Duck, I'm not sure yet, because that's what Matt renamed our dog yesterday. Silly Legend of Mana, such a bad influence. Or I could go with the theme I did when I was playing the PS2 Harvest Moon game, naming my dog Molech and all my cows and whatnot after random demons, because in the last I named them after Ayashi no Ceres characters.
So last night was weird, because my phone-stalker whom I hadn't heard from in months called while I was running around the world of Final Fantasy VIII obsessively gathering cards. I've spoken of her before, a girl I met once in the sick-room when I was in 9th grade and who has called me (at time ridiculously) often ever since. Also bear in mind that I have now graduated from high school. Anyway, she called for the first time in quite the while and informed me that she had come out as a lesbian. Which was a surprise to me, but not surprising that she said she'd been getting crap flung at her left and right at my former high school and had transferred (the area I live in is ridiculously NOT diverse, in any sense of the word-quite WASP-ish). While we spoke for a bit, she was talking about how if heterosexuals have a right to be proud of their sexuality, so folks of other orientations, which struck me as rather strange. I suppose we then have to evaluate with constitutes being "proud" of one's orientation is...I'm certainly well aware of my orientation, and it's not entirely on the straight side, but I wouldn't call myself "proud" of it; it's more just something that's part of me, something I don't usually think about until something is mentioned or some such. Of course, this may also have something to do with my closeted-ness, which is how I intend for things to remain, at least to my family if not my friends, though I've not admitted it to many and don't really plan to admit it to many more. I've decided that if my death predates that of my parents', I do not want them to know the truth of my condition (which is how I refer to it, not in the most terribly positive manner), I don't wish to tarnish their image of me. Which is sad, the very fact that it would "tarnish" it. People, one's sexual orientation is far from the defining characteristic of their person...but that's what you get when your father's a homophobic conservative. And then you can further complicate the situation because he doesn't believe in the concept of bisexuality, so perhaps he'd just live in the denial. So yes, I am living with hiding my orientation, and thankfully I don't have to directly lie about it often, because I despise lying. But still...I'm not sure even if I had been raised in a household that was not disapproving of such conditions that I'd be "proud" of it. I guess it's never been something I've been painfully self-aware of, methinks.
But on other notes, I got my old skool fix this morning, courtesy of the new He-Man. Which has always confused me. You know, the whole "He-Man" and "She-ra" thing. I mean, what's the deal with the gender-specific pronoun names? And how'd that one chick turn into a ninja? And then I got to see the happy shiny new Tranformers Armada commercial, which Matt promptly squealed at. However, speaking of said boyfriend, I should mention some things. First, he's the biggest mecha nerd I've ever met, which isn't a bad thing. Which always means he naturally frequents mecha-centric websites, such as this one. However, in his Internetting journeys, he found something that confused and disturbed him just as much as me, relating to Japan's unhealthy obsession with Rei Ayanami from Evangelion. These are the new Evangelion toys, which can be viewed here. Am I the only one who reacted to this with a resounding "What the HELL?" I mean, EVERYTHING made little-to-no sense. For instance, why is Rei garbed in an Eva-03 suit and flashing everyone? What is an Eva-03 suit anyway? There are no "Eva suits", there are plug suits, which look nothing like this, other than in their tightness. Then you have to account for the sexual nature of the toys, particularly Saran-plug-suit Asuka with new masturbating action. YARG. Yes my poppets, fear the darkness that is the nation of Japan. Well, at least until 2012 when it sinks good thanks to geologic chaos, along with my poor home-state and various locales about the globe, thank you to the Mayans. Not that it's their fault, mind you, but part of their creepy predictions, which many other distinctly non-related ancient cultures seem to echo the same thing, that'll also supposedly have something to do with polar reversal or some such madness. I'll get back to y'all on this later though, I need not speak of what I do not know. But anyway, I'm rather hungry, so it's dinner-time for me. More meaningless drivel at a later date.
chronos
Ekairos
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